A
key step missing in today’s performance appraisal cycle
is performance counseling. The results of appraisal are at best
used to decide training needs and at worse not followed upon.
However without a discussion or reflection on what are the training
needs or why the employee had these needs, the employee often
fails to participate in the rest of cycle. The root cause for
this situation is the inability of managers and HR people to effectively
counsel others. In a discussion with Madrasmarkets, Mr.Paul Prakasam,
a leading counselor of Chennai city, discusses the powerful aspects
of counseling.
What
is not counseling?
Often
counseling is mistaken for a variety of other activities. Counseling
is not
-
Chit-chatting
-
Preaching morality
- Offering
advice
-
Gossiping and curiosity
- Bossing
over others
Who
is a counselor? What is counseling?
A
counselor is a helper who helps you to make a decision –
not more, not less.
Counseling seeks to help towards constructive change, in some
aspect of their life via media a caring relationship and within
agreed boundaries.
Sometimes when faced with a situation that calls for decision-making,
a counselee is not able understand the situation. Hence they are
left confused as to how to proceed. At this stage they need a
person who they can talk to about the situation so that more light
is thrown on the situation. Several issues are clarified and they
develop an understanding of the situation first of all. Once the
situation is clear to the decision-maker then the counselor can
guide him to the concerned resource people who have specialized
knowledge to solve specific issues.
How
should one counsel?
There
are several approaches to counseling, but all should aim to help
the counselee. The most powerful approach I have seen is the client-centered
approach. At its heart is the growth of the counselee. In this
approach the fundamental assumption made is that the client has
potential to solving the problem himself. So the counselor merely
facilitates him in his problem situation by acting like a sounding
board.
By taking the stand that the client has potential and can grow,
the counselor distinguishes him from a professional who gets paid
for solving the problem of the counselee. You have to separate
the person from the problem. So in this perspective you concentrate
on issues such as coping with the issue, potential and growth
of counselee.
Who
cannot be a counselor?
Since the objective of counseling is to help, anyone who cannot
help cannot be a counselor. These are some types who cannot be
counselors:
A
person who has high levels of curiosity
A person who cannot mingle with others
A bossy person
A rescuer who is like a superman
If
you are curious you cannot establish an atmosphere of trust with
the other person and you cant help them. Besides if the counselee
gets the impression that the counselor is merely curious then
all his hopes will be dashed however good you are.
Bossy people often don’t bother to listen to others. Problems
are shameful situations to them and they want to straighten out
everything. So they cant help others.
A lonely person obviously cannot listen to others as he feels
intimidated in their company.
Supermen with an attitude like ‘You don’t worry, let
me do it for you’ will end up not letting the counselee
do what he or she ought to be doing. One may help the counselee
but not to the extent of making them dependent on themselves.
What are the boundaries that a counselor- counselee situation
should have? Can a manager be a counselor too?
There always has to be a counsellor’s distance with the
counselee. Counselee’s, when they come with a problem and
reveal it, are putting himself or herself in a vulnerable state.
The counselor should never exploit this vulnerability by keeping
himself and the other person in the correct place.
A manager can be a counselor too but he should make it clear as
to when he is a manager and when he is a counselor. It demands
a high degree of maturity and skill.
For ideal counseling, the counselee should approach the counselor
not vice versa. If it goes the other way around it would mean
that the counselor assumes that the counselee needs his help.
A manager who becomes a counselor should listen and understand
the employee’s perspective. As a counselor he should understand
the behavioral change brought about by the situation change.
To post your feedback, comments or ask for counseling services
please email hrd@madrasmarkets.com. For
in-depth discussion of issues send an email to hrdissues-subscribe@yahoogroups.com.
Contact us for further consultation.
